I'm bulimic, I think I have a throat ulcer...Am vomitting blood I think?

Hey guys so I'm 15 and a girl and recently I've been going through a hard time. I've been bulimic for about 1 and a half months and steadily lost 16lbs. I used to weight 135lbs, at 5'5, but my friends and boys had subtly commented on a DAILY basis that I was kinda chubby. Even my dad hinted at it. I do work out, but I already ate healthy and was still chubby looking. All my friends eat lots of crap, don't work out, and still manage to be 110-115lbs... I really hate it. But I like being bulimic, I'm not a pig about it. I digest my breakfast (bowl of fresh pineapple, apple, pear, strawberries, blueberries, yogurt, porridge, gl of milk, gl of orange juice), skip lunch, eat later at home, purge, eat dinner, then purge. To reduce damage, I swish baking powder/warm water in my mouth to deactivate the acidity in my mouth to avoid enamel and gum decay but now I'm pretty sure I'm vomitting blood and I'm really scared because I heard somewhere that if you have a stomach ulcer you could unknowingly bleed to death.... Last time I vomited was when I got home and it looked like watery with some reddish in it. The back of my throat doesn't burn, but I just had dinner (didn't purge) and my lower esophagus feels sore, like a dull ache. Almost like a stiff spine. Can anyone provide advice, tips? I don't want to seek medical help, because if it is a stomach ulcer it wasn't like pure blood vomit, just tinted since stomach acid is clear.